As I got more and more involved with girls, I began to wrestle with a question – which factor was a bigger part of the equation when I finally got with a girl?
Is it really because I’m fierce as a tiger? Or is it because the girl gave me the opportunity to finally get together?
First of all, my answer definitely favors the former. But as I became more and more in control of the entire direction of the relationship, the answer in my mind changed instead.
Why were girls so willing to match my pace and follow my plan?
Sometimes I would feel a little awkward responding to something a girl said or handling a detail, but why did the girl just smile slightly and not care about more?
It feels like those biologists and geneticists who stopped serving humanity as a whole when they realized that the whole world, the whole of nature, the whole of the ecological cycle was so subtly and wonderfully composed. The beings at the top of the ecological chain pride themselves on being the operators of the whole of nature.
Instead, they will begin to wonder: did God design everything long ago, the whole self-consistent nature so perfect that human beings are just an ordinary piece of the puzzle.
The story I had to tell my female neighbor on the 16th floor and I
My favorite places to visit are not big cities with tall buildings, but mountains and oceans with high altitude and rare species.
And the person who first made me think of such an insignificant idea was Swallow.
When the story with Swallow ended, I realized that my answer began to lean towards B involuntarily.
And because of meeting Swallow, I began to face myself squarely – even though I’ve perfected the previous 99%, you can only be 100% with a girl if you have her permission to be 100% with her.
Without the girl’s perfection, it’s useless for two people to be intimate.
I was rushing out that day to catch a meeting at the office. When he walked out of the neighborhood, he brushed shoulders with Swallow, who was returning to the neighborhood.
Off-duty time, Yanzi’s dress is too different – from head to toe are black tight pants, chest only a row of English trademark.
The black color was already skinny, with a yoga mat resting on his right shoulder and a ponytail neatly tied behind his head. It looked like he’d just gotten back from the gym.
But she was carrying a briefcase on her left shoulder at the same time – I was totally confused by this picture and became more and more curious about this person.
The story I had to tell with my female neighbor on the 16th floor
Referring to the rendering, it was an impromptu idea to strike up a conversation, so I didn’t have time to take pictures haha
Swallow just entered the neighborhood and stopped, looking sideways for the access card. Just then, I saw her profile. At that moment, I decided to make each other’s acquaintance without hesitation.
So I turned around and chased her into the neighborhood.
In the evening, the neighborhood was bustling with adults walking their children, people walking their dogs, office workers walking express, couples walking.
Because of the large number of people, have not been able to find a suitable place to strike up a conversation. Coupled with the fact that Swallow is in a hurry, only to tail all the way, waiting for an opportunity.
However, the more you chase the more entangled – just out, how to go back?
That’s right, the direction Swallow took was the building I live in.
The story I had to tell with my female neighbor on the 16th floor
This is the actual shot, but it’s taken after the facthhh
In the end, when she stopped in front of building #9 in neighborhood F, my whole body was bad.
A lot of thoughts popped up at the same time:
If the pickup doesn’t work, will it be awkward to meet up later?
Will it be awkward to meet in the future if the WeChat chat dies?
If… Will it be awkward?
Just as my thoughts were being disorganized, there was a click, and Swallow’s keys fell to the ground. She was about to bend down to pick them up when the yoga mat on her shoulder fell off. Instantly, Yanzi frowned.
Seeing this, I hurriedly went forward and helped her pick up the keys.
“Well, just now I saw you at the entrance of the neighborhood, I wanted to run up to say hello, but I kept getting blocked, and finally I realized that you and I live in the same building ……”
After all, I opened the door for her with my own doorstop to show that I wasn’t lying, “I’m going back to the company for a meeting, can I meet you?”
Honestly say your intention to come, there is no set up, my sincerity and caution let Yanzi did not refuse.
Yanzi took her cell phone, I looked at her yoga mat and asked, “Did you just go to the gym?”
“The gym was crowded today, so I took my yoga mat back and exercised a little.”
Getting a topic that I could start on WeChat, I ended the conversation sharply.
On the way back to the office, I thought about the conversation I had just had. What impressed me most was not her appearance, nor my own performance, but her hurried steps, and the frown she dropped to the ground ……
After adding WeChat, it was just a few sentences of old neighborly greetings and family routine. The night we met, Yanzi and I basically chatted to the level of ordinary friends.
(If you don’t know the stages of chatting, come to my chatting class, and yes, this is a sponsor-required advertisement.)
At this point, some brethren will ask, what next then?
Should we continue to advance the relationship between the two through chatting? Or should we start showing our lion colors and start chasing the girl on the other side of the screen in the animal world?
To your dismay, Mr. Zhao, neither of these scenarios happened.
Yanzi and I chatted slowly into the next day. Chengdu in late spring is a bit lazy and warm. I had nothing to do at home all day, not even going out.
In the evening, I didn’t want to stay home anymore. The weather in late spring is like a young girl at the end of her puberty, always hooking you and you can’t help but be attracted to her.
But I’ve never been one to go out alone. What can I do? After thinking about it, I decided to give Swallow a call.
You must be thinking: I’ve only met you for the second day, you don’t know each other very well yet, is it appropriate to ask someone out?
What I was thinking was – call it whatever, whatever.
At five o’clock in the evening, casually invited Swallow to drink milk tea. Unexpectedly, Swallow agreed readily.
The story I had to tell with my female neighbor on the 16th floor
Since the two had only just met, there was no basis for any communication, so the only thing to do after meeting was to have a good chat.
The so-called good chat is to make the other person feel comfortable talking to you.
Comfort here is not telling a joke a joke, but showing your social intuition – when to listen, when to agree, when to flirt, when to change the subject, when to be quiet ……
Doing these things well will make girls feel that you know how to get along with you comfortably, and comfort is the premise of all possibilities for two people to get along.
After buying milk tea, Yanzi proposed, “You should not know, our neighborhood has a back garden, right? Let me take you for a stroll?”
So, one evening in late spring, I followed Swallow to a quiet place where the quiet environment relaxed her. Slowly, Swallow talked more and more.
From how the developer of our neighborhood reneged on its promise to change the planned big park into a small garden; to how hard it was for her to look at properties and how her company moved from across the neighborhood to 10 kilometers away …… I just chimed in with the occasional comment, letting her complain to her heart’s content.
Not long after strolling through the small park, the chatty Yanzi offered to take me to the villa area of the neighborhood. That’s when I realized that the milk tea was missing from her hand.
“Drink it,” I said.
Yanzi said, “There’s too much material in it, it’s not good, throw it away.” In a whirlwind, she began to sigh again, “I really envy you, you can run around in style all by yourself, if I didn’t have children, I would like to live a life like yours.”
Yanzi’s words pulled me back to reality.
I completely froze and was forced to say a stupid thing: “Then …… you will give it to the child father.”
“The child is mine.” After Yanzi finished, the air fell into complete silence.
Unexpectedly, Yanzi, who is five years younger than me, is a single mother of a two-year-old child.
To ease the embarrassment, Yanzi began to talk about her experience.
The story I had to tell about the female neighbor on the 16th floor and me
She studied Business English in college and was outgoing and independent. Yanzi originally planned to join a foreign company after graduation and have the opportunity to travel around. However, her family’s insistence made the only daughter finally choose to obey.
After graduation, Yanzi entered a state-owned enterprise under her family’s arrangement. Immediately afterward, she married her ex-husband whom she met on a blind date. Within a year, their child was born.
However, in this extremely uneventful life, there was no xingxin after all. At the end of last year, the two broke up due to personality problems.
Getting custody of the child Yanzi was caught in a dilemma – according to her character, she wanted to go out and walk the country, but the child’s care is so that she can not spill. In this way, she looked around in the comfort of the state-owned enterprises and the triviality of the family, doubly overwhelmed.
“I think it’s amazing that you’re able to take care of your children and keep your work organized, and at the same time, you have a heart that’s not willing to be ordinary.” Thinking about it, thinking about how to comfort Swallow.
“I think being able to do all these things well at the same time is very impressive, right now you are waiting for an opportunity, this opportunity may take a long time, or it may be very soon. But only if you do well what you are doing right now, can you grab it when it comes?”
After a pause, I added, “You’re already doing a lot better than a lot of people, don’t deny yourself now.”
That night, we wandered around for almost two hours before walking back downstairs to No. 9. I could feel that this chatting and sharing made Yanzi relax a lot.
The story I had to tell with my female neighbor on the 16th floor
However the effect of walking didn’t last long, and the comforting words were ultimately just a placebo to temporarily delay the pain. Within a few days, Yanzi began to suffer from frequent insomnia again.
Thus, the late-night insomniac, and I, who was used to being a night owl, often met in the early hours of the morning unexpectedly.
—-
“Every time I go to sleep, you go out HIGH, every time I wake up in the middle of the night, you come home from HIGH.”
“Oh, next time you have insomnia, you’ll know who to call.”
—-
“Some of our coworkers are watching the Avengers premiere tonight, they should be watching it now.”
“I don’t like to get together, I prefer to lay on the couch and watch my favorites.”
“I used to love going to college, but I don’t go much anymore after I work.”
“Did you ever notice that you slept better back then than you do now?”
“It seems like you always find a reason why I don’t sleep well.”
“Sign up for VIP subscription, where can I find such a good doctor?”
—-
“I read my son a bedtime story tonight and he was asleep before I finished.”
“It worked great, I’ll try it sometime.”
“Do you still tell bedtime stories?”
“Skill pack is full!”
The story I had to tell my female neighbor on the 16th floor and I
Movies, bedtime reading, travel, hometown …… We talk about random topics, sometimes boring, sometimes profound, sometimes for hours at a time, and sometimes she falls asleep without saying a few words.
Although we didn’t go for a walk for a week after that, the way we met late at night on WeChat gave us a special connection with each other.
I don’t know how deep our chats went or how strong our connection was, but whenever I had doubts about how things were progressing between the two of us, Yanzi would always show up late at night in a friendly and welcoming manner. It made me feel like there should be some progress between us.
On the night we were talking about the Avengers and movies, I vaguely mentioned, “Next time you have insomnia, let’s make a late night movie date.”
“Are you expecting me to have trouble sleeping?”
“If you’re not expecting it, expect it.”
“Hahaha, I’m going to bed, you go to bed early too.”
This time, the effort to draw closer to each other fell flat. Just as I was about to fall into a daze and confusion again, an hour later, I received a message from Yanzi – “I didn’t fall asleep ……”
I summoned up the courage to return: go, accompany me to buy a midnight snack!
The story I had to tell with my female neighbor on the 16th floor
When I saw Swallow downstairs, I found her wearing a late fall sweater on a warm spring night.
“Cold?” I said, holding her hand and asking.
Swallow didn’t answer, just felt unnatural in her hand before I calmly let go.
As we walked to the kiosk, we casually chatted for a few moments, and I noticed that Yanzi’s eyes were in a bit of a trance – the kind of blankness where you don’t know where you are.
“You order, I don’t eat.” Looking at the various late-night snacks arrayed left and right, Yanzi looked distracted.
And when I came back after buying the chow mein, I found Yan Zi holding a serving of sake brew.
“Suddenly I felt hungry again,” Swallow explained when I realized that she had still bought a large portion ……
When I entered my house, Swallow, who was wearing a sweater, suddenly screamed about the heat, but even though I turned on the air conditioner, Swallow was still sweating profusely. Just like that, I ate my chow mein in silence, and Swallow anxiously dried her noodles while using a paper towel. Before long, the table was piled high with paper towels used to wipe away the sweat. In this state, Swallow only ate a few bites of her late-night snack before pushing it aside, saying she couldn’t eat any more.
Under my puzzled gaze, Swallow got up from the sofa, paced back and forth for a while, saw the hanging chair in the living room, dove into it, and began to doze off.
The story I had to tell with my female neighbor on the 16th floor
Like a swallow without a head, she didn’t know what to say to persuade her. After she lay down in the hanging chair, I was afraid of waking her up and lowered my voice for dinner.
Within a few minutes, the swallow that was snoring a second before suddenly woke up. Once again, I saw her frowning eyebrows, exactly the same as when I first saw her.
“I’d better go home and sleep.” Swallow suddenly said.
“You look like this, it’s not good to go home and sleep, come over here on the couch, I’ll lend you my shoulder for a while.” My tone at that time was calm and indifferent. Said, he pushed the night snack coffee table to one side, patted the empty seat beside him, signaling her to come over.
Swallow leaned against me and closed her eyes, gradually calming down, but after a while, she frowned again, “This light is so bright.”
I took my hand off her neck, stood up, turned off the light, and sat back down. This time, I took her in my arms, my tone gentle, “Is it okay?”
In the living room where there was only moonlight outside the window, I looked at Yan Zi, the two of them were very close, Yan Zi also looked at me, I found a hint of shyness in her eyes ……
That night, Swallow once again talked about her troubles. The content was the same as the last time we went. I stroked her hair while humming. We both knew very well that the predicament she was in now could not be solved in the short term.
The only thing I could do was to find a way to release the pent up depression in my mind. After that, continue to fall into a stagnant life, carrying the weight forward.
Other than that, there was no other way, no solution.
After that, the frequency of Swallow contacting me dropped dramatically. This made me calm down and recall all the details of my relationship with her.
Anxiety and uneasiness ran throughout my interactions with Swallow:
Dropping one thing after another when she struck up a conversation;
Willingness to take walks with me because I hoped someone would listen to her;
Finding milk tea hard to suck and losing patience;
Talking late into the night when she didn’t care what was said, just wanted to relieve her boredom;
sometimes he says he doesn’t want a late night snack, then he buys the biggest portion and fills up in a few bites;
sweating profusely in an air-conditioned room;
Obviously falling asleep in a sling chair and waking up on his own;
Yes, the frustration of marriage, the trouble of work, the triviality of the family, the discrepancy between reality and ideal …… All this came one after another, making Yanzi fall into unprecedented anxiety.
As a result, she often suffered from insomnia, and it was at this time that an uninvited guest intruded into her life ……
The story I had to tell with my female neighbor on the 16th floor